Tuesday, April 25, 2006

Literary Grasping

I've been saving up for a new computer, a laptop. My old computer, a fossil from the last century, is giving me problems. I'd been looking at computers for months, but I'm shy of buying. You see, I have this little problem: I hate letting go--of anything! I hate letting go of money and my old computer. I hate to say that I'm stingy or cheap. I just have so much attachment to these things (There's a reason why Buddhists believe grasping is the root of suffering.) I ate cheaply, went to less movies, stayed home most Friday and Saturday nights to save up for a computer. It took several months of effort. Now, I don't want to let that money go, because I worked so hard to get it. The same with my old computer. I've written two novels on it, countless stories and essays. The keyboard is dirty from my greasy fingers pounding on it. I know money and a computer are just objects, but I attached memories, meaning to these things. It makes it hard to let go.

My last hold out is my car. I've kept it alive for 16 years. My car, Buster, has outlasted relationships. Buster has helped me move props to theatres, furniture to different apartments, driven me to writing classes, helped me take dates to dinner. I've made love in that car! (Okay, maybe that was too much information.) You get the gist. I can't see myself giving Buster up. I got it when I graduated college. My best friend Adele said Buster is almost college age himself and I need to let go of it.

Oy, I need to meditate on this.

12 comments:

Sundry said...

When you are ready...consider a Toshiba laptop. I and three of my writer friends have them and have been pretty happy with them. (One of them has had hers for more than 6 years!)

I would say under no circumstances let yourself be talked into a Dell. They are Dellish beasts. I lost so many pages of writing and spent so much time on customer support telephone calls that I scrapped mine after about a year and a half, and it was still under warrenty.

Rich said...

Buying a Mac is very Zen :-)

thelastnoel said...

I've been leaning toward a Toshiba. Thanks for the Dell information. Uh, I'd never really been much of a MAC person.

Paul said...

Dude...Mac's last forever. And I understand not wanting to let things go. I still have my very 1st stuffed animal ever...Tigey. Got it in 1965 when I was in the hospital for my then-new lack of thumb. Still have it, though it has virtually no fur on it.

Jason Phoon said...

Hmm .. i'm using a dell laptop. Been okay so far this year. Hope it doesn't blow up within another year. But yeah , I heard toshiba is good.

ver said...

I'm with Rich & Paul. A Mac is very zen. A Mac lasts forever. And—most important of all—a Mac is sexy.

I'm just saying.

jamie robertson said...

"I'd never really been much of a MAC person."

The transition from windows to Mac has never been easier. It only takes a little while to get used to the differences in the look and locations of things.

I've done tech support for both Macs and PCs for 20 years, and on the whole the headaches involved with Windows support make me wonder why anyone would want a PC. You'll always hear stories from both camps about how they had a machine that was great or that gave them trouble. What I'm saying is that statistically speaking, the Mac is far more reliable - and it's a joy to use. Do yourself a favor, and at least visit the local Apple store to see the latest laptops. I don't think you'll regret it.

Ibarionex R. Perello said...

You often have to get rid of things that have outlived their usefulness to make room for something better.

That goes for a lot of things, but in this case it's a computer and maybe a car.

If it were me, it would be a Mac and a Mustang. Aw, the longings the middle age bring.

Angelo said...

I'm using a Mac. (Made the switch late last year.)

Everyone at ICON uses a Mac too. :-) And so far, we're all very happy with the Apple.

You sure you don't want to take a bite too?

Angelo said...

Also, I think the Mac has become like a gay gadget here in Manila. It's amusing.

Almost every gay guy I see at Starbucks or Coffee Bean and Tea Leaf is using a Mac. Haha!

Bob Hoeppner said...

I think the sentimental value we place on objects which have been the medium for so many good memories is the healthiest form of materialism.

danton remoto said...

well, noel, during the storm in manila last weekend there were blackouts. but jollibee had a generator so i went to one near ateneo and ate two pieces of fried chicken. not good for my waistline but who cares?

next week, my co-teachers and i are going on a writers' retreat in boracay (an oxymoron, i know). i have to skip the jollibee trips for now.

do you know that when i went to singapore last year, the fil gays there asked me to bring three cartons of jollibee friend chicken? i had to hide them in my bag, a feat considering how super strict singaporean customs people are.

hail to jollibee!